I’m about an hour away from going and getting me and The Phoenix some of my as-yet-unattempted Griffith Park Loop, but in the meanwhile I’ve just been concocting in the kitchen.

See lately, as part of my healthier eating kick, I’ve been doing the egg-substitute veggie scramble for breakfast. Then if I get a touch of the hungries during the day I’ll usually do a medley of chopped up fruit consisting of a banana, an apple, a grapefruit and an orange or tangerine.

Having been visited by the aforementioned hungries I gathered together the above-mentioned fruit and as I’m cutting the grapefruit into wedges a neon sign goes off in my head that reads FRUIT SMOOTHIE.

Oh hell yeah!

So first I bust out the food processor but I quickly realize I don’t need to complicate this. I don’t need to mush things up first in the Cuisinart and then blend it all up in the blender. I can go it the whole way with just the latter utensil.

I’m not proud of this mind you, but I do believe I giggled. With glee.

So into the Osterizer goes the grapefruit and a couple tangerines and a banana and an apple and what the hell, howsabout a couple kiwi and some baby carrots while I’m at it. Room for a lime? Sure. Followed by a container of lowfat yogurt. Anything else? I give momentary but sincere consideration to both a dash of Cap’n Crunch and some coldcuts, but veto both. I’m not entirely insane.

All that’s left is to press the 10th button on the far right of the panel (the one after LIQUIFY that just has an exclamation point and a little hard hat icon) and presto-grindo I’ve got a blender bubbling full of some sort of thick oozey sludge that looks…

Fruit Smoothie

…shall we say: abstract. And its taste? Well, it tasted like a half-assed mash-up of a grapefruit and a banana and an apple and a couple tangerines and kiwis and lime and carrots and some yogurt, but I chugged every last fabulous yummified drop of the stuff!