Bionic Rhymes With Moronic

As with every fall TV season I usually get all revved up about a show. Last year it was “Heroes,” and this time around it was “The Bionic Woman,” which NBC went to such serious lengths to hype. Sure enough the biggity bigbig debut was last night and I bought into the massive build-up enough to discard the third episode of Ken Burns’ mostly riveting (but sometimes not so much) “The War” over on PBS.

I am ashamed.

Already over “The Old Adventures Of The New Jaime” less than a half-hour in but willing to let it come back after one more commercial break for one last chance to redeem itself, we shut it off right after the bionic woman ends up in an alley searching for a mysterious departed rogue blonde and the writers in all their lack of originality reached knuckle-deep into the cliché pool to pull out disposable meaningless Character No. 12, otherwise known as: The Creepy Hoodlum Who Appears From Out Of The Shadows To Open A Switchblade And Confidently Threaten The Seemingly Helpless But Decidedly Not Protagonist With Bodily Harm Only To Be Immediately Disarmed And Have His Ass Short-Order Handed To Him.

Talk about putting the “yawn” in bionic. Zzzzzzzzzz.