Interview With The Three Felines

So my baby was catching up on my blog and found a comment to my Dodger game post from Shannon and when she clicked over to read her blog called “Sha in L.A.” she found a cat interview meme and took it upon herself to put the following questions to Bink, which you can read here. Susan left it to me to interview the other three cats in the house:

Top to bottom: Pepper, Jiggy, Pumpkin

1. Your ages?

Pepper: 8 last week.
Jiggy: 3 1/2 — but don’t bother asking Pumpkin… he’s a bit “challenged” shall we say?
Pumpkin: I’m the Pumpkin!
Jiggy: Pumpkin’s about 4-1/2.

2. Your ages when came to live with your people?

Pepper: 1
Jiggy: 12 weeks or so.
Pumpkin: I’m the Pumpkin!
Jiggy (sighing): I’d guess Pumpkin was about 1-1/2.

3.What color are the collars you’re wearing right now?

Pepper: Collars? I don’t wear no stinking collars.
Jiggy: Likewise.
Pumpkin: What’s a collar? I’m the Pumpkin!

4. Who is your favorite person other than the people you live with?

Pepper: I’d say Tiffany the pet sitter.
Jiggy: I’d agree with that.
Pumpkin runs off for no reason

5. How much do you weigh?

Pepper: I’m about 17 pounds. Yeah baby!
Jiggy: Around 10. Lean and mean. Pumpkin’s somewhere around 15. All muscle, especially in his brain.
Pumpkin (from the living room): What’s a collar?

6. Most expensive thing you’ve ever clawed?

Pepper: Probably the leather club chair in the library
Jiggy: A white silk sportcoat from Brooks Brothers that I ruined by using it to climb up to the top shelf of a closet.

7. Do you like other cats?

Pepper: I don’t know if I’d say I like any other cats beyond the ones I live with, but I’m curious about others in the neighborhood.
Jiggy: Yeah, it’s kind of an action-reaction thing. I’ll be friendly if they are.
Pumpkin (running back into the kitchen): There are other cats?

8. Who is your best non-human friend?

Pepper: I’d say Jiggy even though I tried to kill him when we first met.
Jiggy: He’s not kidding! Bastard tried to choke me out when I first joined the team but now I’d say he’s my best buddy.
Pumpkin: The backyard.

9. Cat Nip Toys or Fake Mice?

Pepper & Jiggy (simultaneously): Definitely cat nip!
Pumpkin: I’m the Pumpkin!

10. Do you like to be brushed?

Pepper: It’s all right.
Jiggy: Yeah I can take it or leave it.
Pumpkin takes a nap

11. Tuna or Milk?

Pepper: Tuna
Jiggy: Tuna
Pumpkin: Zzzzzzzz

12. How do you feel about getting your toenails cut?

Pepper: Personally, I hate it. These are the tools of my trade and then whack, with a few clips they’re duller than a dog’s capacity for conversation.
Jiggy: No one comes near my nails but the things I’m trying to kill with them.
Pumpkin (stirring in his sleep): Uh, Pumpkin… Hai!

13. Any formal education?

Pepper: Yeah, Julliard — you fucking kidding me? I’m a cat.
Jiggy (laughing): School of hard knocks baby!
Pumpkin (awake now, stretching): Mmmmmmmppppph brbrbrbrbrph.

14. Couch potato or Energizer Bunny?

Pepper: C to the O to the U-C-H!
Jiggy: The latter.
Pumpkin: I’m the Pumpkin!

15. What are some nicknames your people call you?

Pepper: Let’s see… there’s Pep, Peps, Pepperbah. Obstreperous Pepperous, Peppitus, Peppitus Rex.
Jiggy: Um, The Jig, Jiggamus, The Jigster, JiggyJam
Pumpkin: Oh I know this one! Pumpitus, Pumpum, Rumpumpumpity. I’m the Pumpkin!

16. What is your best trick?

Pepper: I can make food disappear really fast.
Jiggy: I can jump five feet straight up and scale eight-foot fences
Pumpkin: My breath smells like catfood!

17. Do you like doggies?

Pepper: Strange dogs, hell no. But I live with two one quiet older one named Shadow and one young punk named Ranger but they’re both cool.
Jiggy: Ranger and I get along pretty good and Shadow’s part cat so it’s like we’re related.
Pumpkin (running off): Dogs!? Where?!

18. What did you have for breakfast?

Pepper: What do you think, crepes? I had some Fancy Feast and some Whiskas.
Jiggy: The same.
Pumpkin (from the dining room): Where’d everybody go?

19. Can you hunt (aka have you ever killed anything living)?

Pepper: I’m a great ambush bug catcher.
Jiggy: Name it. Birds, mice, rats, lizards, bugs… I’ve caught ’em all.
Pumpkin (running back into the kitchen): Is it dinner yet?

20. When & why was the last time you went to the V.E.T.?

Pepper (looking at Jiggy): I think it was for roundworm in ’03, right?
Jiggy (shutters) Don’t remind me.
Pumpkin: What’s V.E.T.?

21. Where do you sleep at night?

Pepper: Sometimes in the top deck of the catminium or maybe midlevel on a chair, I like to nap in the hallway on my back a lot.
Jiggy: Maybe on the piano or one of the chairs in the dining room or atop the armoire in the bedroom whenever we’re allowed in there.
Pumpkin (napping): Zzzzzzz.

22. Do you like to swim?

Pepper: What the fuck does that mean, “swim.” Whatever it is it sounds like it involves water so no, I don’t.
Jiggy: Swimming sucks.
Pumpkin: Zzzzzzzz.

23. Can you make kitties?

Pepper: No and proud of it. There are two many cats in the world nowadays.
Jiggy: Nope. I got “snipped” so to speak in 2005.
Pumpkin (having a bad dream): No doc! No!!

24. Your favorite place to visit?

Pepper: The occasionally welcoming lap is a treat, but I mainly dig hanging out on the small brown rug in the library and scratching the hell out of it.
Jiggy: Anywhere outside.
Pumpkin (wide awake): I know this one! A freshly cleaned litter box!
Pepper and Jiggy nod knowingly.

25. Do you purr?

Pepper: Whenever I can!
Jiggy: When the situation warrants.
Pumpkin: I’m the Pumpkin!