June 13, 2008 7:23 am
This Is Nature’s Way Of Saying “Psych!”
Posted by Will under backyarchaeology, nature
[5] Comments
Sigh. I love figs. I mean I LOVE figs. Maybe not 81 of them, like the pile pictured here that I picked up around the patio this morning, but a few good fresh, ripened figs from a tree is a joy to me. Num num num. Num.
The fig trees in our our backyard produce thousands of fruit each spring and summer, but whatever the cause for the failure none of it isĀ ever evar ripe. Don’t let the darker ones in the bunch above fool you, they are all dry, tasteless inedible greenwaste that drop with a plop to the patio thanks to gravity or perhaps with a little help from the squirrels who sometimes nibble them before doing a squirrel version of “Ack, patooey!” and droppin’ ‘em like their hot… or more appropriately not, as in ripe. Or even remotely tasty.
And every morning throughout this time of year I have a new chore to my list in going out and picking up the pieces. Today was a record landfall (probably to be broken tomorrow), so before I pitched them into the green bin I assembled them for a group pic and to lament being the fig-loving butt of mother nature’s sense of humor.



June 13th, 2008 at 11:21 pm
And you’re sure this isn’t one of those fig varieties that are plump and green when ripe? My ex had a tree that bore bright green fat figs with red pulp when they were ripe. Probably that’s a stupid question and you’re rolling your eyes like “yes, lady I know what kind of figs these are,” but I figured I’d mention it just in case these are the non-brown variety. Probably it’s just a mean trick of nature–the crab fig tree.
June 14th, 2008 at 7:25 am
Long have I hoped that very thing, Travis. But alas I’ve busted open many a greeny only to find dry white blech-y flavor-free nothing inside.
June 14th, 2008 at 4:23 pm
We must all be gifted with completely different taste buds. In my opinion, those things are nasty and they don’t even belong in a Newton! Ack Patooey indeed.
June 14th, 2008 at 11:59 pm
I have a neighbor with a tree like that, totally tasteless figs that never get sweet. Sigh. Years ago I used to get the greatest figs off a tree near 9th and Hoover. Wonder if it’s still there…
June 23rd, 2008 at 2:24 am
Everything grows better with fertilizer. Fruit which does not ripen could indicate something lacking in the soil. Have you tried spreading manure or compost around the tree?
Have you talked to the people at sunset nursery?